Matt Bors for November 02, 2007

Transcript:

Future Liberations of Iraq 2008: Turkey invades. Renames the north "Turkmenistan" and starts a war with the REAL Turkmenistan over naming rights. What's left of Iraq 2009: Iran carves out a provocatively-shaped province. Motivation: Unknown. 2011: Israeli settlements. Heaps of 'em. Blackwater autonomous region created in the south. Bullets and gun oil used as official currency. 2017: Syria, Egypt, and Norway invade. Exxon Nation attacks BP Republic. Kim Jong-Il drops nukes from his deathbed. Millions die. BP 2024: Parker Brothers brought in to settle territorial disputes. Partitions country into neat jigsaw puzzle-shaped framework. 2036: VICTORY! The Democratic Republic of Iraq flourishes within its 12 square miles!