Breaking Cat News by Georgia Dunn for December 12, 2023

Where is Elvis with the “Dignified Response”? If Lupin can even half prove his point he’ll never let them live it down. Just imagine the level of Sunflower Poofiness Elvis will explode to should that happen!

Why does Santa’s sleigh look like a watermelon slice?

Santa passed away in 1876 40 years after being responsible for the death of the legendary Dave Crockett.

Tell it, Lupin! Defend your case!

We were on your wavelength last week, Lupin!

OK, even though we didn’t finish out the alphabet for Puck yesterday, let’s see if we have better luck with Lupin.

Lupin is an adventurous cat!

I love how Lupin is being inspired by the trust of the kittens to actually try learning the truth about Santa.

Lupin is brandishing that ruler like a veteran math teacher!

Poems as proof. Go with it, Lupin!

I hear no evidence for shape shifter.

Throughout Western Literature? I’d like to see support for that claim.

This is going to be interesting.

“Little” and “tiny” and “miniature” are relative. By that definition, Santa would be tiny for a rhinoceros, but that doesn’t mean he can fit through a chimney.

In Moore’s story, Santa also is dressed all in fur and he’s covered with ashes and soot…so an elf-size Santa, in probably brownish fur that is dirty, smoking a pipe, and driving a tiny sleigh with eight tiny reindeer. Take that, Coca Cola Santa!!!

Lupin is SERIOUS!!!

Woah!! Lupin is seriously onto something here!

Of course, how else is he able to fit down chimneys with a big bag ’o toys ?

not really OT cats and popcorn

Miniature sleigh? Look like watermelon to me. Mmmmm…!

Only one book has answers to all your questions Lupin. You knows which one.

Lupin, I thought you knew this before doing the research?

The crew’s speculations about things are some of my favorite parts of the entire strip. :D

Father Christmas lives within all of us believers .

I can hear Lupin smacking that ruler, to make his point! By the way, has he consulted. Dr. Scutles, on this? (hope I spelled his name right!)

Sami reindeer herders (Lapland/Siberia) and magic mushrooms may have contributed elements to the Santa Clause story. (Delete the underscores)

https: //.ca_/oss_/article_/history/origins-santamaybe

On a side note, has anyone else read Crumb this morning? It’s too perfect!

Thomas Nast drew the modern Santa in 1888.

Go Lupin! Cite those sources!

Moore named it “A Visit from St. Nicholas”.

Yes, Lupin is actually on something here. Catnip perhaps?!

Santa actually wasn’t depicted as rotund until sometime in the 1940s, I think. Before then, he was depicted more in line with the usual image of elves. Love Lupin actually citing his sources!

You go, Lupin. Keep presenting your evidence.

Meanwhile, Back on the Nile

At the Royal Palace

Elvis-Anum: After I finish transcribing these Tengwar Scrolls, I need to go through the collection to see what needs weeding out.

Beatrixia: And then you’ll give the weeded scrolls to the Artisans?

Elvis-Anum: Yes. Ora Z will have plenty of stuff to shred.

Enter Maat-Tilda and Sophititi

Tillie: Hello, Elvis and Bea. We’re here to ask a favour.

Bea: It must be important, since you’re asking with a British accent.

Soph: It is. We need to use borrow some inks.

Elvis: Of course. But don’t you have plenty of jewels to make ink?

Soph: Actually, most of them are Fe-Anaro’s beautiful but indestructible jewels.

Elvis: I guess everything has its disadvantage. Take as much as you need.

Tillie: And we need someone to help us knead papyrus pulp.

Bea: Look no further.

Elvis: It looks like you will need some ordinary jewels eventually. I’ll leave a note for Mag-Lor to see if they have any jewel dust.

Soph: And of course the Royal Procurers will have some ideas as well.

Cat teacher, his subject:

Is Santa fantasy?

He wants proof so badly

Charts and ruler help with his journey

For answers, there’s longing

He’s read many a page

Book marking, he’s so close now

To becoming the cutest sage

Don’t blame, don’t blame him

He knows Santa’s story

Don’t shame, don’t shame him

He’s full of history

Some cats may be jealous

You know how truth can upset

Sometimes it’s not so easy

To be both a teacher and a pet

Don’t blame, don’t blame him

He knows his famed subject

Don’t shame, don’t shame him

About Santa, he’s correct

Shape-shifter? Oh, how perfect!

- Gordon Matthew Sumner – Don’t Stand So Close to Me

Someone said we needed a chart from Lupin. Well, you asked for it and you got it. :) Lupin must have learned a few things from Professor Puck ;)

We picture elves as being little, but in Lord of the Rings elves are tall warriors!

I posted this article in a reply somewhere earlier, but it’s so great, I needed to post it again here on its own >

Georgia posted this on X/Twitter today about Lupin. "You know that one hilarious guy in college who was super wild and the life of every party, but somehow also nailed every exam and pulled off straight A’s?

Yeah, that’s Lupin."

Wait until the poor cats realize the true nature of Santa Clause.

He is trafficker in elf suffering and slavery. He keeps captive a bunch of elves year round to build toys for him with never a hint of pay. Nor do they ever get a vacation or time off. Think about it, have you ever seen an elf or elves lying around on the beach enjoying the day, have you ever seen them at Disney or Universal riding the rides, or at the local bar having a beer or two, maybe a friendly game of pool or darts? NO!!!!

And then there is Santa Clause himself. Talk about your creepy character, he sees you when you are sleeping, oh lovely. He knows when you are awake, a serial stalker if I ever saw one, he know if you’ve been bad or good, spying on you in your most intimate moments, and then he wants YOU to be good. Talk about a Groomer.

And this whole flying business, he has no license to fly, his sleigh isn’t registered with the FAA or any other country, he never files a flight plan, enters restricted air space of all kind wantonly and maliciously. On top of that, everyone know that reindeer, nor any other member of the deer family can actually fly. That means that old Santa is practicing the Black Art of Witchcraft to get his reindeer and sleigh off of the ground. Someone should inform the ASPCA about him drugging these poor animals to get them to haul his illegal and unsafe flying vehicle around the sky.

To top it off, he is a bugler extraordinaire. He sneaks into homes, in the wee hours of the night via various sundry means, extorting cookies and milk from the homeowners just to feed his sugar addiction, instead of calling to make sure you are available and coming to the door at a decent hour to share some time together like any decent person would.

Someone needs to tell Lupin and Ora Zella the truth about this fat, old, creepy, criminal of a man before it is too late.

Point to Lupin!

Legolas and the boys might have something to say about elves being little…

You are right, Lupin. I never thought of it before!

Testing.

Ok, I got it right finally in one of my replies. Why does gocomics hate links? But one more time on it’s own. Great article. https://Publicdomainreview.org/collection/a-pictorial-history-of-santa-claus/

By the way, if Lupin is right about all of this, then that’s a little goodie that Rankin Bass missed

The miniature sleigh does look like an ice skate in some aspects.

We had a cable and internet outage. It just came back. Lupin rocks!

Oh my gosh, he’s so right. . .

A few days ago I was watching a TV show about the history of Santa and it mentioned that he had a history of being an elf and small.

My beautiful 2024 BCN calendar just arrived! I was so worried about the mailman cramming it into the mailbox, but guess what—the calendar was shipped in a cardboard box, so they had to place it on the front stoop. No bent corners!

I gotta go with really small. His clothes are all tarnished with ashes and soot, presumably from the interior of the chimney flue, but the beard on his chin is immaculate (despite having been through the same flue as his clothes). I can only conclude that he tucks his beard inside his coat during the descent (and subsequent ascent).

Santa is from Gallifrey, and his sleigh is a TARDIS. This is how he gets around the entire earth to deliver presents to all the good little girls and boys and gets into houses with or without a chimney.

There is no canonical height for elves. Tolkien’s elves are talker than humans. In folktales about humans being trapped in Elfland (don’t eat or drink anything, folks) the elves are human sized. Then in other stories they’re tiny.

You are Lupin, you are! :-))

Well, I have to admit that Lupin may have a point here.

I talked with Santa at a school Christmas party he was attending this evening, so I told him about our discussion here and asked how he got down chimneys. His answer? One word—magic :) So if shape shifting is a form of magic, Santa did not actually dispute it.

yup, just as I thought.

I was eating lunch with the oldest girl today and she mentioned that she was glad I never did the Elf on the Shelf thing when she was little. I told her about the Jewish version and while I was trying to remember the Mensch on the Bench she asked if it was a Dreidel in the Cradle. And we were off and running.

A cute kitten sighting, amid a lovely carol. (about 2 minutes in…)It makes me think of Ora Zella… remove underscore and capital T.

https://you_Tu.be/7SPLN1g_ZFY?si=S4-WeAQ5AtclK5_F

Lupin is having too much fun. I like it.

My calendars have arrived! My calendars have arrived! Yay and double yay!