Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for April 01, 2024

That is a tough question.

It’s vacuum packed.

So if you really suck at it, it will be just like new.

I suspect that people in YouTube videos are using a super-thin material that folds down thinner.

What are those signs for?

I’m sure there are people who can do it but they’re not telling for fear of being burnt as a witch.

I was expecting something about understanding women.

My mom can do it with her eyes closed. I have watched her do it many times, and I still just roll mine into a ball!

My better half seems to have mastered that one. I was amazed first time I saw her ‘pull it off’.

They use hydraulic presses.

Who folds them? Laundry basket. Washer. Dryer. Back on the bed.

My mom taught me to fold fitted sheets. Not difficult.

Something like “What is the sound of one hand clamping?” Is easy-peasy, I guess.

Yay Entropy!!!!

A girl I had worked with started to explain to me how to fold a fitted sheet. I ended up tuning her out. I still don’t know how and don’t care.

Google How to fold a fitted sheet video

Nice to see that Amazon delivers to mountaintop locations.

There is a Youtube video that shows how to do it. I still cannot do it

He just had to underline the word “great” on his sign!

google ‘consumer reports how to fold a fitted sheet’ the video frrom -6/24/2014 is better.

Unfortunately, they don’t seem to make “fitted” sheets any more. At least I don’t think “fits from 8” to 20" constitutes a fitted sheet. Unless you have a mattress 20" thick. Anything less means having to retuck the corners every day.

Folding a fitted sheet like it was in the package is simple, one corner at a time.

Amen on the fitted sheet! Impossible.

Years ago… it might have been “How to fold a roadmap, back the way it came.”

“Gorsh Olive, willya folds me roadmap fors me?”

It’s very easy to do. Grab all the corners, bring together, lay flat. Fold in half, roll in a ball, carry upstairs and make bed.

It used to be doable on the older sheets that had only the corners elasticized. The newer ones have elastic on all sides and they can’t be folded. I just try to shape it best I can into a small rectangle

It that’s the guy’s biggest problem, he obviously hasn’t read the news lately.

Detroit local TV late 1950s, The Lady of Charm. She could do it and my mom watched. My mom could fold a fitted sheet just like it came out of the package. Sadly, none of her children learned the trick.

you fold fitted sheets like a regular sheet. You just use the top of the corner as the actual corner with the rest hanging inside.

Folding fitted sheets … that’s dark, dark unmentionable magic.

Isn’t it folded around a piece of cardboard?

I’ll buy that!

He’s right. It can’t be done.

It can be done, but the only hint I’ll give is that at one point you should have a skinny triangle! ;-)

I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit, and on the slitted sheet I sit.

I can fold a fitted sheet, but it simply isn’t worth the effort v reward.

The answer isn’t 42…

Martha Stewart showed how. You figure out to fold into long strips then roll up together like a beach blanket. Easier to pick and choose if you have multiple.

fold? sheets?

Just roll it up and stuff it in closet.

For that, there’s YouTube.

Yah jes’ take your bottom sheet and rolls it up in a ball, like a big pair o’ Granny Panties.

As young man between band gigs I sometimes worked for my landlady, who owned a commercial laundry (which she was quite capable of operating alone, but would give us poor starving hippies work whenever we needed it). Her main account was the bed linens for a local hotel, and she taught me how to fold a fitted sheet perfectly.

I forgot how decades ago, and am back to rolling them…….

I know how to fold one, but I was sworn to secrecy.

Oh, this strip gives me the sheets!

I talked to a woman who said it was easy. Then she said putting a cover on a duvet was simple. I could have slapped her.

Never bother to fold them, I just wash, dry and put them back on the bed.

OK, kids, listen up: You take the fitted sheet and spread it on something — a bed or, if you have one, a big table — upside down. Then you make sure the corners are squared flat. Then you fold the thing. It isn’t as flat as when you buy it, but it’s flat. Why fold it? Because the linen closet is a lot easier to navigate when the stuff in it is flat. And no, I don’t have an engineering degree or experience in the clothing-folding industry. I just figured it out after many years of frustration. One advantage of getting very, very old.

It’s because they are packed in low-Earth orbit in a high-vacuum facility. :)

I found an article on how to fold them. Couldn’t understand it. Suspect it was just gibberish intended to pull our leg.

Any significance to the concept of a “correct” way to fold a fitted sheet being published on April Fools’ Day?

My question would be, if the Universe has an end, what’s on the other side?

You need a sheet board.

Ok, here is how you fold fitted sheets. I will only explain this once. First you take the sheets out of the dryer. Second you pull out all the clother that gets twisted into the corners. Third, now listen carfully, you ball it up and throw it into the linen closet. Easy-peasy.

Ya takes a piller case and stuffs yer sheets and the other piller case into the first one. Neats as ya might want her.

My Honey played a good one on me this Morn. I came into the kitchen. She was there with a suitcase and her coat on. “I’m leavin’ and I ain’t a comin back”. I was just sayin’ how I was gonna miss her, when she started to laugh, “Gotcha! April Fools!” Well, was good for a few seconds.

Coincidentally, I was wondering that very same thing just yesterday as I folded some laundry.

That’s a little mystery. A great mystery is like explaining why no battle plan ever survives contact with the enemy .. or why people keep voting for them, ’cause it only encourages them – something like that.

Amen to that!!! Martha Stewart once demonstrated on tv and I still couldn’t do it.

My ex-girlfriend once told me I was the only person she had ever met who could fold a fitted sheet neater than when it came out of the package. Even her mother was amazed.

My wife makes it look really easy, but I found that if I pull them out of the dryer and put them on the bed, I DON’T HAVE TO FOLD THE DARN THINGS!

Just keep tucking it into it self until the bundle disappears into a black hole.

Folding sheets? Why? I buy my sheet sets one at a time and wash them once a week. Into the washer, then the dryer, then back onto the bed.

I can fold one up into a flat shape that will fit reasonably well into my linen closet. Is it perfect, like it just came out of the package? Of course not. Do I want to waste time and effort on such a project? Of course not.

Who’s gonna know or care what the inside of your linen closet looks like? The County Closet Inspector is required to keep all records confidential, and the photos are encrypted.